My first day of school, EVER, or how I learned to take the hard knocks & make sure the show goes on

I'll preface this entry by saying, what happened here is the epitome of my life, for better or worse!

The first day of school is scary for anyone, especially the first day of Kindergarten.  I mean, that's where it ALL starts, you're not quite 6-years-old, and you have NO IDEA what to expect!  I mean, all you know, in your little kid's mind, is that it's FUCKING SCARY! 


Anyway, I went to school that early-September day, very timidly (especially for me), and I rolled with it. I did what the teacher said, made a couple of friends, took some bullshit from wise-asses, and basically minded my own business and had a good time.  (I also wondered what the hell was up with the Principal, who was a nun who looked like Ernest Borgnine with a habit, but I digress).

At the very end of the day, around 2:00 or so, we had Gym Class in the field in the back of the school.  We played some game called "Cowboys and Indians", which involved those who were designated as Cowboys to capture the Indians and make them one of their own....or the other way around.  Anyway, it involved a lot of running around and catching people and that sort of thing.


I don't know how it happened, but I remember some girl running toward me, and I did the best I could to get the hell away from her, but....however it happened, we ran smack-dab into each other, and we knocked heads, and fell to the ground, and started crying like any kid would.  At least that's how the story goes.  I was helped up & my tears were wiped when the teacher and his assistant noticed that I had a bruise underneath my eye and on my cheek.  The girl who plowed into me had a similar problem, although, if I remember correctly, not quite as COLORFUL as mine (of course).  He said something like, "Oh....Great!"  I'm sure that the prospect of sending not one, but TWO kids home from their first day of fucking KINDERGARTEN wasn't exactly how he wished to end his day, hahahaha.


So, anyway, I went home with what was turning into quite the deep black and blue shiner to contrast with my baby-blue right eye.  My Mom, ever the good sport, didn't raise too much of a fuss (she'd had seven boys before me, you know), was sympathetic enough, but, clearly, I was ok.  I sat down in front of the tv to watch Woody fucking Woodpecker and eat some Jello or some shit, when my Mom, with a very concerned look, poked her head in from the kitchen, saying something like, "You have to be the RING BEARER in your brother, DAVE's WEDDING with that shiner of yours!" The only thing I could muster up to say was, "UH OH!!!!"


But....what the hell were we to do?  Postpone the wedding because the groom's peckerheaded baby brother, who's supposed to carry the damn wedding rings in a pillow down the aisle, got a black eye on his first day of school?!!  Was some other kid going to be the ring bearer in the wedding?  Hell no!  My brother, Dave, and his bride-to-be, Heidi, had honored me by asking me to be in their wedding, and there was no way I wasn't going to do it! 

So, the wedding day came.  I was suited up in a little tuxedo that was a little bit big for me, and the bridesmaids were CRAZY about me, in my little tux with the darkest shiner in Minnesota History.  I was, believe it or not, really quite shy, as I didn't become girl-crazy until the 2nd or 3rd Grade, hahahahaha.  There was a flower girl in the wedding too, who was about my age, but I don't remember getting along with her as well.  I do remember walking down the aisle with her, carrying a little pillow with the wedding rings, while she took flower petals out of a basket and tossed them on the ground.  I remember thinking, "WHY is she DOING that?!  She's making a MESS!  Someone's gonna yell at her to PICK THAT UP!"  No one did, hahahaha.

I learned a lot from that experience at that tender young age.  From then on, it was always about getting up, dusting off, turning chicken shit into chicken salad, and making it happen.  And we did!  I think that it gave me my "SHOW MUST GO ON" attitude that I've always had about everything I do.  I think it taught me not to be a wuss about things, to take shit as it comes and deal with the hard knocks, come what may.  Why let something relatively minor tarnish the big picture?  Screw that.  Nothing is impossible, really.  There are just different kinds of things that are POSSIBLE that will blow your mind!  Furthermore, taking a hard knock or 12 along the way makes for a great story later on.

Post Script: About six months later, during Gym Class again, I got yet another black eye.  This time, it was because the jerkoff next to me kept raising the plastic fucking hockey stick too high while we were playing floor hockey, and hit me in the eye.  I kept telling him to stop raising his stick so high, but he wouldn't listen.  He didn't even get into trouble!   So, here we go again!  

For some reason, I'd be willing to bet my life is a lot more fun than his is.......



The Old New Me Taken on the Chin by Slim Dunlap @ ARTISTdirect.com

The Best Little Kiss-Off in Texas...Or Was That a Blow-Off?

This past March, my band The Dirty Pearls played at South By Southwest in Austin, TX.  It was a week full of adventures, fun, and  Rock N' Roll. I had a great time playing Rock N' Roll and partying with my homeboys.  That's what we do!


But the funniest thing I remember about it happened the night we got there.


I was walking down the massively crowded street on my own after checking out some band somewhere...I was wearing my new (at the time) Chinese Police Hat, and was feeling pretty damn good about it.  While I was carefully considering just where the source of my next beer might be, a gaggle of DIPFUCKS walked by me. One of them had the panache to yell to me, "HEY, nice HAT ya fucking FAGGOT!!!"


I was stunned, not only that this cock mongrel had the insolence to imply that I was a homosexual, but by the fact that he was clearly an ignoramus for not recognizing a fucking cool hat when he saw one!  And, let me tell you, Gentle Reader, there was going to be RETRIBUTION!!!!

I turned around, and I BELLOWED after the whole lot of them, these immortal words that will make them think twice before ever again disparaging another Rock N' Roller (at a MUSIC FESTIVAL, no less). 


I screamed, "HEY!!!  If I'm such a FAGGOT, why don't you come on OVER here, and SUCK MY FUCKIN' DICK?!!!!!"


The blowhard in question then turned around, and said, "WHAT?!  WHAT WAS THAT?!!!"


I then pointed to my pelvic region with both hands, and answered, "I SAID, 'SUCK MY DICK!!!!' AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!"


Of course, the boys in shorts didn't attempt to intervene any further, and I walked away, very satisfied with myself!  And, I hit the drums even harder than I normally would at the gigs we played over the next couple of days.  Here is some footage:

Thanks for reading!


Marty E.

Feeling the Rain of or Taking a Shine to my personal favorite Summertime songs

It's been a long time since I've written on this blog of mine, and suddenly, it's Summertime!  Things are good, there's a lot going on, and....well, I guess I'm going to talk about the music going through my head while it happens.....how the hell do you like that?


For me, Summer isn't really that different than any other season, save for the fact that I should probably get a goddamn air conditioner, and it's going to be too damn hot for most of my scarves, leather jackets, dark clothes, and boots (but, fuck it, I'm wearing the damn boots, and you'll NEVER see me wearing shorts unless you see me at the beach.....and most of you who are reading this will not.....ok?)


That being said, Summer is a great time, not only for fun in the sun and relaxing on the beach (which I do occasionally)....but for cool, killer nights on the town.....drinking beers on rooftops....taking the long way home on foot....Hefeweizen beers on the sidewalk (with lemons, not oranges, ok?)...gin & tonics....Central Park....barbecues....all that shit....it's fun.....


Anyway, these are my favorite songs that sort of.....convey the spirit of Summer, as I feel it, in my heart and mind.  It isn't all fun and games, but....it's real, and.....it's all GOOD!  Don't worry about the order....that could change in a matter of minutes.......


#1. Urge Overkill-"Sister Havana"


GOD I still LOVE Urge Overkill.  These guys were the first band of the so-called "Alternative Era" to....sort of exemplify and attitude of that, to me, said, (to their contamporaries), "Look, guys....I  understand that you're all PC and intelligent and all of that cool shit, but.....we can still PARTY OUR ASSES OFF, can't we?!!"   I thought so!


To me, UO were sort of....like Kiss/Cheap Trick meets Neil Diamond (and of course, their biggest hit was a cover of a Neil Diamond song, go figure).  It was definitely incongruous to a lot of the dismal, depressing output of a lot of 90's bands (not that I'm a real big fan of overly happy music, but you know what I mean).  They wore their UO-embossed medallions and their egos on their sleeves, and I thought it was great.  In a time when such things weren't fashionable, they made no bones about the fact that they wanted to be stars....and in my mind, they were.  I just wish the rest of the country had sort of caught on.....but my tastes and the tastes of the American Public have not always seen eye-to-eye.


No matter, this song was probably their most well-crafted and artfully-produced track.  It is packed with hooks (even in the fucking BRIDGE), has a huge chorus....I can't believe they didn't pack arenas with this! It epitomized the UO M.O. to a T (how do you like that?) and....it's fucking FUN!  The video mirrors that perfectly, don't you think?







There you go.....it makes sense now, doesn't it?




#2. The Barracudas-"Summer Fun"


I love surf music.  It's fun and laid back, but the rhythm of it is, at times, fucking relentless!  Which is the reason why I got into the Barracudas: their drummer, Nicky Turner, went on to play in one of my favorite post-punk/goth bands, the Lords of the New Church....and whose drumming I've always loved (more on that in a future entry on here!)


I don't need to do a lot of explaining here....just watch the damn video!





#3. Van Halen-"Panama"


There is, perhaps, no American Rock N' Roll band that, for my ears, represents an American Summer fucking Vacation than Van Halen with David Lee Roth.  Hell, I could have put this song at #1 on my chart here....and made the whole chart consist solely of Van Halen songs....but that would have been too damn predictable....and besides that....I'm doing this as I go along.....Summertime is about spontaneity, alright?


I remember being a little kid watching this video, with all the cars and motorcycles and women and beers and on-the-road hijinks, and I remember thinking to myself that THIS was the way to live.  Hell, I still DO think that, for that matter.  This video sort of.....represents my every hope and dream as much as any.  I haven't obtained them all yet, but....getting there is indeed half of the fun....so....lets get to getting there, shall we? Plus, who doesn't love women and cars? It's as American as apple pie....and, yup, there's a joke in there somewhere!!!







#4. The Thrills-"Deckchairs and Cigarettes"


This song is my favorite...."Fuck and forget about everything in the world and relax and if the world ends now, it's as good a time as any," kind of song.  This video clip is the best I could find.....but you should buy the album.  I wouldn't be a bit surprised if some of their songs would make the Beach Boys blush!


"....just don't change a thing...."


Beautiful!





#5. AC/DC-"Let There Be Rock"


Every time I hear this song, I think back to when I still lived in Minneapolis.....and I'd wake up hungover and alone on a Sunday afternoon in my little studio apartment downtown, next to I-94.....the fan blowing in my face....and I'd say to myself, "Screw THIS....I gotta get OUT of here!"  And I'd go out to my pick-up truck and start driving....with both windows down, and my shades pulled down tightly, to hide from the Sun that I was trying to catch up with....and more often than not, I'd put in AC/DC's If You Want Blood....You've Got It (Live) into the stereo.....and I'd drive all over the Twin Cities metro area, with no destination in mind....and I wouldn't come back until well after dark.


That is, until I didn't come back at all, but that's another story!


How BADASS is that opening riff?







That's what I thought too.


#6. The Cure-"Icing Sugar"


This song is a different animal altogether.  This is the sort of song I like to put on when I'm getting ready to go out, right before midnight.....and it's been so HOT, that it's practically raining inside your apartment, but.....there's a breeze easing in through the window.  It's telling you that something crazy and awesome is in the air and that it is about to become one hell of a night.....and to prepare......and take heed....don't wait up....





#7. The Beach Boys-"Surfer Girl"


....because I'd be a total asshole if I didn't have a fucking Beach Boys song on here, ok?!


And this song is awesome....







#8. The Cult-"Love Removal Machine"


This is another "beer-drinking in the bed of the pick-up truck in the woods" kinds of songs. Rick Rubin, as a producer, really helped these guys hit the nail on the head with this entire album. I mean, he basically took a post-punk/goth gang of brits and turned them into a down and dirty classic-Americana Rock N' Roll band (despite having them rip off fellow Brits the Rolling Stones and AC/DC, from down under, but....you get my point....hell, those bands took American Rock N' Roll and made it their own & threw it back at us, no?)


Anyway, the Cult delivered with power and grace on here, and I'll never stop loving this song....but this song never sounds better than it does when the heat is taking you over. You know exactly what I mean.







#9. Neil Young-"Thrasher"


This song holds a special place in my heart, for different reasons, most likely, than any other songs I'm mentioning here.


Back when I was in the Midwest, and knew I had to get out in order to....well, become what I am, and what I have yet to become....I did a lot of soul-searching and explored a lot of possibilities. For a minute, I thought I might go down to Phoenix and play with an awesome, tragic, glam/pop/rock band down there. It didn't work out. Then, there was an opportunity for me to play with a gritty, no-frills Punk N' Roll band in LA and hit the road with them immediately....and I was close to doing so. I was going to pack up my truck and make the drive out, living, what I refer to as the "Neil Young Dream"....which is sort of what his lyric (from this song), "I was just getting up, hit the road before it's light, tryin' to catch an hour on the sun". How great is that? Well, I sort of chickened out on that though, and....well, it was for the best (long story, but it wouldn't have been a good move for me at the time).


But I knew at that time that I had to act, to DO something. All of my friends were starting to get real jobs and real lives; they started getting married and having families. And God bless them, for that's what people DO, right? Hell, I'm sure glad MY parents did.


But, I had to do something else, and finally I did, and 10 years later, here I am.


But this song, to me, is sort of about....discovering that you're something different, than, perhaps, the world expects you to be. It's about realizing what your aspirations are, and the hard choices you have to make and the risks you have to take to get on the right track to fulfilling them. And the metaphors with which Neil illustrates this are really beautiful and picturesque....almost pastoral, in a matter of speaking. He spoke of his peers (supposedly, he was referring to Crosby, Stills, and Nash) "Hiding behind hay bales", "Lost in rock formations", "Or became park bench mutations"....while he "burned my credit card for feul" "Through the timeless gorge of changes, where sleeplessness awaits". Daunting stuff to be sure....and I sort of feel like, in my own way, I experienced that as well, in my own way. And the funny thing is, I was listening to this album and this song in particular when all that was going on. It's kind of crazy to listen to it today, and sort of feel the history of my relationship with a song like this. But I guess that could be said for a lot of them couldn't it?


Do you know what I mean?





#10. The Rolling Stones-"Little T&A"


I could have probably put just about any Stones album on here.


But....well, you know when your walking down the street, and you see a total babe with a no-nonsense walk, long legs, and a face full of attitude that has no time for you....and a killer body wrapped in just enough cotton to carry it?


Well, when I see that, this song starts reverberating through my mind....and what better song could be, really?





#11. Bananarama-"Cruel Summer"


I don't care what anyone says, I love this song.


It may be cheesy 80's pop, but....it carries the mood of the "Dog Days of Summer" and communicates it so well...yet, it still manages to make it kind of fun! It's undeniable, and very infectious.


Admit, it....you like it too!


The video has great images of a New York City I never got to experience.





#12. Billy Idol-"Hot in the City"


This song makes me smile every single time I hear it. I guess it's the lyric, "When a long-legged lovely walks by, you can see the look in her eye, then you know that it's HOT IN THE CITY TONIGHT!"


I know, deep stuff, right?


It doesn't hurt that this song is so TOTALLY about New York, either.


It's my favorite song to put on right after midnight when I dj at one of my Rock N' Roll haunts in NYC. It makes everyone dance and sing along, and hell, sometimes I do too.


Even though this song is 25-years-old, there's always a timeless sense of "Right Fucking Now" when that happens, and...to me, that's a big part of what Rock N' Roll is all about.





How about you?


#13. Janes Addiction-"Summertime Rolls"


This is another "forget it all" song....and I don't know how anyone could help but love it.


I mean, despite the sordid nature of Janes Addictions image, the lyrics of this song are a innocent as any I've ever heard. "Children...screaming TAG", "She says stop! I'm a girl", "Her nose is painted pepper Sunlight", her song says, "If you want a friend, feed any animal". I mean, you'd have to have icy slush going through your veins for those images not to evoke something within you, as far as I'm concerned.


There was no band like Janes Addiction.





#14. Guns N' Roses-"Reckless Life"


Just because.





#15. Ramones-"Rockaway Beach"


Because there's no other REAL New York City beach song.


No, Lou Reed's "Coney Island Baby" doesn't count! (I love that song, but it's not about the beach, ok?)







Thanks for reading!


Marty E.

You Should Have Never Opened That Door or This Might Have Been The Guy Everyone's Parents Warned Us About (Wierd Tales from the City, Part 1)

When I moved to New York City, over 9 years ago, it was even harder to find a place to live than it is now....hell, I'd say it was a *lot* harder, now that I think about it. There was no Craig's List, to speak of (I think maybe it was just starting at that point) for one to find ads in, nor was there Facebook/Twitter/Myspace, etc, to help get the word across. There was the Village Voice (the PRINT version), but anything listed in there was almost always GONE by the time you even had a chance to read the ad. There were all kinds of "services" that would supposedly give you "lists" of available apartments if you'd give them, for, like, $200....but most of those were scams, and often, they were just reprints of the Voice ads. Fuckers.

There was one service that I used that *was* legit, and...to the lady who worked there that helped me....wherever she is, God bless your heart, wherever you are....and to my good friend Alfredo, who had a very soft floor in Bay Ridge, Brooklyn for me to crash on for the time-being.

That being said, it was still quite the adventure calling all these people who were looking for roommates, figuring out whether or not they were worth pursuing, and inevitably hopping all over a sweltering New York City (which I didn't know my way around quite yet, but was learning) to look at these apartments and meet these people.

[Overwhelming? Welcome to my life....and maybe yours too, right?]

But I'm writing today to tell you about the best story I picked up while desperately seeking a feasible living space. Some of you who know me might have heard this one, but....this is the type of story that NEVER gets old, and one I will never forget.

So, I saw a listing for a room in a two-bedroom apartment on the Upper West Side of Manhattan, right by the corner of 83rd and Broadway, for about $700. So far, so good, right? So, I called this dude, who sounded sane and cool enough in the brief conversation I had with him on the phone. Furthermore, if I remember correctly, I believe I was the first caller, which inspired confidence. So I made an appointment to see meet this guy at his apartment that afternoon, around 3pm. Good shit!

So, I looked at my trusty Subway map and got my ass in gear and went over there....the apartment was on the 8th floor I think....the building at a doctor's office at street level....I got in the elevator, which lifted me to the 8th floor. The first thing I saw when the doors opened up was a "welcome" mat that said, "GET LOST!" I looked at my piece of paper, and was relieved that this was NOT the apartment I was to look at (but it was, indeed, good advice, as we're about to find out). I turned to my left and walked on down to the end of the hall, and knocked on the door.

The door opened up....and what I saw was a weird motherfucker in his mid-fifties....he sort of looked like a way-more-weathered Gary Busey. He was fat, had "gin blossons" on his nose, and had the three long hairs on his head pulled back in a pony tail. No shit. He sort of lunged at me, grabbed one of my shoulders, while "patting" the other one (pretty hard, mind you), sort of pulled me in and bellowed, "HI! HOW are YOUUU?!!!! You must me MARRRRRTY!!!!!" The guy seemed to be perpetually shouting...not in an angry way but....they guy was just too happy in his own skin, especially when it looked like that!

Anyway, we stepped into the living room, where there were two grand pianos, some sheet music strewn on the floor, and some college kid from Laos, who was all of 19-years-old at the very most, lying on a mat in the corner. "THIS IS ONE OF MY TENANTS," the guy said. I wondered how much he was charging this poor kid for a corner of the living room....but it occurred to me quickly that I'd rather not know what the arrangement was.

He led me to the room I was there to look at, which was fine....then we went through the door to the bathroom....then through another door to his room....all the while, he was constantly patting my shoulders....the thought of which still makes me queasy. I guess he wanted to discuss business in his room. Great. "HAVE A SEAT HERE....on the BED", he all but screamed. "Fuck that shit", I was thinking, while I practically jumped into the chair at his desk instead.

So he began telling me his story, with occasional interjections from me. "WELL....I'm an ACTOR and I TEACH PIANO LESSONS in the LIVING ROOM, there, which is why the PIANOS are IN THERE!!!! I go OUT from TIME to TIME, and DRINK and PLAY CARDS.....and I DATE MEN AND WOMEN...."

Which, is fine, but.....

Holy shit, this guy was just too much!!!! Do you remember the dude you were afraid was going to come and GET you when you were a little kid and couldn't sleep? Well, THIS was the GUY!

So, I mentioned that my former girlfriend from back home was to visit me for a week or so, and asked if he would have a problem with that. "NOOOOOO.....NOPE....I can't be HAVING THAT," he roared.

"OK, then," I said, "Um....really nice meeting you anyway!"

Hahahahahaha....

It wasn't over yet. Apparently he had to go downstairs for something, so....I had to do what no living organism ever wanted to do, and that was get in the elevator with this guy!

So, in the elevator, he asked me why I moved to New York, and I briefly explained to him that I was a drummer looking for a band.

Without as much as a split second's hesitation, he ROARED, "YEAH!!!! THAT WAY YOU CAN BE A ROCK STAR and FUCK 'EM AAAAAALLLLLLL!!!!!!!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

[I couldn't do anything but laugh my ass off right along with him, if only because....I knew what he meant when he said, "ALL"!

The End.

Another review of The Perfect Age of Rock N' Roll

Thanks, Jay!

http://thesexyarmpit.blogspot.com/2006/06/perfect-age-of-rock-and-roll-review.html

One day in the life of a performer who always needs to be on or next time I wonder what it will be like if I just go out & get drunk the night before

Last Wednesday, I went to the studio w/ The Dirty Pearls to record a song which has become our anthem, "New York City is a Drug" with Daniel Rey producing.

The night before, I decided to stay clear of drinking/partying/trouble of any kind in an attempt to get a decent night's sleep for once. Well that was a fucking great idea. I had a Grolsch beer to stabilize my system, read from Bukowski's Women (an old favorite of mine that I've been revisiting lately), listened to some Gram Parsons....and tried to sleep. Well, that didn't work. I tossed and turned, as if my bed was a washing machine set to the goddamn "Spin" cycle. You know how that it is when you know that you need your rest, and the pressure thereof prevents you from getting that rest? That was me. So, I wound up getting two hours of it. I fell asleep around 8am...and Daniel called me up at 10:15 to tell me he was on his way to pick me up....well....I remember what Klaus Meine of the Scorpions once said, "Being a Rock N' Roller is a lot like being an athlete...you have to perform no matter how you feel." Damn right!

So, I put my Thin Lizzy shirt on, grabbed my cymbals, and walked downstairs into the pissing rain, and got into Daniel's car. I told him immediately that I was going on two hours' sleep. He laughed and said, "Yeah, well, you can never sleep the night before a session...I got four hours' sleep myself!"

Yeah, I like this guy. So we drove over, talked about the Ramones, Circus of Power, and whatever the fuck else. Daniel had told me that he had called Tom (an awesome engineer, owner of Nuthouse Studios, and a stand-up dude) the night before w/ some specs re: mics and shit in order to cut down set-up time. Awesome.

I like working with a producer - at least one like Daniel, who understands the band's vision and how to achieve it....and creates an atmosphere that's comfortable for everyone to play their best. His authority in the studio goes without saying, but in such a way that allows the band to be itself and themselves. It was a great balance, and a great dynamic. It looked like a winning team between the 7 of us, and I knew I could do my part no matter how much sleep I'd had. Hell, I played a gig one time on less, w/ guys I was unfamiliar with, and it went down without a hitch...I could certainly kill it in the studio with the Pearls.

After spending some time with drum sounds and getting the drum to sound like the artillery needed to blast this song into Rock N' Roll oblivion (which, of course, takes awhile, but not nearly as long as I'm used to for this sort of thing)....Daniel told me to step out and grab a bite to eat and some coffee, because it was going to be time for me to go to work soon.

So I went to this diner down the street. They wouldn't serve breakfast items (it was "lunch time"....fuck....)....so I ordered something called "pretzyl bread", a french onion soup, a buttered roll for one of the guys, and a couple of coffees. Simple enough, right? Nope....I waited like a HALF HOUR for this crap. While I was waiting, the Rolling Stones song, "You Can't Always Get What You Want" came on the radio. While I sipped a coffee and sort of swayed my head along with it, some numbskull in a booth across from me said to the waiter, "Hey Man...who sings this song?"

I rubbed my temples and shook my head in my hands....

The WAY overpriced food/coffee items, after an extended wait? $16....witnessing the stupidity of one who should be old enough to know who the fucking Rolling Stones are? Priceless!

I went back and ate while the other guys got set up for their rhythm tracks (which they were to play along with me) and Tommy's scratch vocal...which again, took awhile, so I rested for a bit...then it was time to go forth and thrash.

We ran through the song a number of times, only stopping occasionally to make sure we were on the right track in terms of sounds and parts, and to make some adjustments with tempos, etc....after a couple of hours or so of this, I was about done, and someone else mentioned being hungry, so we all ordered these kickass italian subs and bs'd about this and that. Afterwhich, Daniel asked us to do one more take....I decided, since the mozzerella was so fresh on my sandwich, that I'd play some of it a little differently this time....which seemed to be to everyone else's liking. After that, I was through with my biggest responsibility, and could sit back and relax. Who needs sleep, anyway?

Dougie's bass playing was so spot-on from the rhythm takes, I don't think he did any overdubs at all....he's a genius, that boy, he really is.

So...onto guitars....Ritchie was first....he added some great parts on there, as well as, most likely, the best solo I've ever heard him play.....it was fucking awesome....nice one, Rich! Then Johnny sat down and added this fucking "spaghetti western" western part that really added depth and dimension to the sound...

This was really turning into something.

The guitarists had had enough at this point, and split....Dougie and I decided to stay and sit in on Tommy vocal takes....which went pretty much without a hitch. I like to be there after I finsih just to add encouragement and all that shit. Tommy batted it out of the park, and finished up his lead vocal lines and the harmonies he wanted to do rather quickly.

Then Daniel, Tommy, Dougie, and I went in to do the gang vocal parts in the choruses (which for me, is the most fun part of a session).....

....and that was it....the track is in the can....we should have it ready in a couple of weeks.....

...the track will go directly to Sirius/XM Radio, and we will be doing a Single Release Party @ Santo's Party House on Thursday, July 23rd....Eve to Adam and Midnight Fistfight and other special guests are on the bill, and it will be an awesome Rock N' Roll event, and there will be lots of surprises....stay tuned!

I, for one, can't wait!

Thanks for reading!

Marty E.

A Rock N' Roll version of "Pay It Forward", or "Working My Way Back to..."????

If you know anything about me, you know that music, especially Rock N' Roll music, is my passion, joy, and pain. From a very lean age, great Rock N' Roll has inspired me to seek out what inspired it, as much as it has to create my own.

I discovered this a LONG time ago, when Guns N' Roses released Appetite For Destruction. For a young lad such as I was at the time, there wasn't ANYTHING that sounded quite like it (especially since I was used to....well, shit like Motley Crue and Kiss, etc, which are fine and good in their own right...but comparatively dim in my view). The music was raw, real, honest, deep, and made no apologies, whether it was about Sex, Drugs, Love, Paranoia, Struggling, Starving, or whathaveyou. But, in hindsite what I REALLY liked about Gn'R was that they name-checked their influences in a LOT of their interviews, and insodoing, they not only did a service to those bands that influenced them by exposing and paying tribute to them, but they were also doing just as much of a service to pint-sized, impressionable fans like myself.

The first band that Gn'R were responsible for turning me onto (besides, perhaps, Aerosmith) were Hanoi Rocks. And the influence was evident right away, not only visually (Axl Rose and Izzy Stadlin', in the early days, certainly resembled Michael Monroe and Andy McCoy), but musically as well. Guns, surely by no coincidence, lifted the title, "Welcome to the Jungle" from a lyric in the chorus if Hanoi Rocks's "Underwater World". That being said, Guns made sure that the first 4 Hanoi Rocks studio albums (and later their live All Those Wasted Years album) got released in the US via Geffen on their Uzi Suicide imprint. You have to admit, that's pretty fucking classy.

The Guns N' Roses/Hanoi Rocks connection didn't end there by any means. First of all, it was then via Hanoi Rocks that I got into the New York Dolls (and of course various spin-off/solo projects rose from their ashes)....for which not enough has been written and there's just too much to write...but case in point, I loved/related to the Dolls pretty quickly and the older I get, the more I love them and what their music represents...which is close to what Gn'R represented, but it was much more controversial to dress up and live that level of decadence in the 70's, which proved, in a nutshell, to be the Dolls' undoing....and the Dolls were and are a New York institution, and as far as Rock N' Roll goes, probably the best and most definitive, for my ears.

Furthermore, it was via Hanoi that I really started to appreciate Punk Rock....sure, I was into the Sex Pistols and the Clash to a minimal degree (at the time), but I didn't quite "get it" yet. Then I read an interview w/ Sami Yaffa in a Hanoi fanzine about how The Damned were his biggest influence, or something along those lines (I've since been able to thank Sami in person, hahahahaha). THIS I understood. They were fun, didn't take themselves too seriously (until much later), wrote great songs, and played them well. And via the Damned, I was able to appreciate what the other Punk Rock bands of that era (especially) had to offer. And that has certainly done a service to me and the music I've played.

Of paramount importance, though, is the fact that the GnR/Hanoi Rocks/Aerosmith/Dolls/English Punk lineage led me, once and for all, to the Rolling Stones....who, like AC/DC and the afrementioned Punk bands, I didn't understand fully until I had been drinking for a little while, hahahaha. I can't really say a goddamn thing about the importance of the Rolling fuckin' Stones that hasn't already been said 75 Billion times, but....it was through those bands who took their style and spun it into their own who brought me to them......

Anyway, I could write a lot about all the directions this could go in, from Motown to Trip Hop to Death Metal (well...a little bit anyway), but who has the time?

My point is, that while listening to your idols is important, it's just as important to listen to your idols' idols...(and maybe a little Billy Idol, for that matter)....so then they become yours too. And furthermore, if you have an opportunity to tell people who are into what you to, you're doing a service not only to the bands in question, but to your listeners. My hope is that one day I find myself on a level at which I can make that matter to lots of people as much as my boyhood icons made it matter to me!

Thanks for reading!

Marty E.

You know that you're a full-fledged New Yorker when...(part 1)

....you can explain, with some degree of sophistication, why a slice of pizza at one place is SO MUCH BETTER than slice of pizza at another place right across the street.

Has it been THAT long?

Well....as difficult as it is for me to believe....I moved my hungry, hopeful, freaked-out, and fed-up self to New York City a whopping 9 years ago today.....

....what I marvel at the most is the fact that one year seems to be more awe-inspiring and crazier than the last. I've had the chance to work in various capacities with some of my heroes, made friends with people who will one day be your heroes, worked my ass off, and partied my face off afterward to celebrate it all. I've experienced joys and pleasures untold that I once didn't think I had the capacity for, and....occasionally, momentarily, felt like chucking it all....but I've always snapped out of that! Thank God...and Thank You! Ahahahahaha.....

As Steven Tyler says, "...see what happens next week!" He's absolutely right.

I have no delusions about the fact that I'm still struggling in a lot of ways. Being too comfortable, though, I guess, removes ones hunger....or at least that's what I've heard....I've rarely ever been terribly comfortable.....and I'm still extremely hungry. That's a damn good thing, because there's just so much more to do. I don't care how shitty the music industry or the economy is...I moved here to make my dreams come true, and have accomplished that in more ways than I ever really knew was possible....so, it's time to conquer the rest! That's a tall order....

Anyone who tells you that something can't be accomplished is speaking merely for himself, and that's fine. Anyone who says that nice guys finish last is completely full of shit, missing the point, and merely justifying his own failures and shortcomings (and chances are damn good he's not THAT nice anyway...how many NICE people have you met who are bitter drama queens? That's what I thought). It depends on how hard the said nice guy is willing to work and how much he believes in himself. And people can read that on your face like a fucking traffic light....it sure isn't rocket science. And sure, a little bit of talent, brains, style, tact, and personality don't hurt either, but hard work and self-confidence sire the rest of these things. Put them all together, and with any LUCK, you move up the ladder, get EXPERIENCE and learn....then....the cycle begins again. As Skynyrd once said, it "Ain't No Good Life" -but if you accept and embrace that fact.....perhaps you can make it so.

I know I'm going to! How about you?

That's what I thought....

For my part, I have recording, gigs on the East and West Coasts, a movie screening, and God knows what else to look forward to for the rest of the year.....thanks to everyone who made it all possible....

Your Good Friend,

Marty E.

NEW YORK CITY IS A DRUG!!!

We enter the recording studio later this month with Producer Daniel Rey (Ramones, Misfits, Richard Hell) to record our anthem "New York City Is A Drug". SIRIUS/XM will be supporting the single as well as hosting the release party! More info on that soon!! In the meantime, here is a video of "New York City Is A Drug" from our performance at our sold out Bowery Ballroom show in April!

There's something strange about music these days or It's been a short time since I Rock N' Roll

I'll preface this entry by granting you that my tastes in music, and perhaps that of people whose paths I cross in New York City, are probably not necessarily typical of the rest of the country, or the world for that matter.

That being said, I dj around town here and there, at least once a week....and not always for the same "types" of people, but, for the most part, for typically younger bar crowds of varying #'s (not clubs - which for some reason seem to exclusively play hip hop and dance music) . But, as always, people will often request songs, which I usually don't mind, as long as people aren't too damn obnoxious about it.

One of the reasons why I like to hear out people's requests is that I'm curious as to what they want to hear....and if you HAVE what they want to hear, you might make a new friend. There's no shame in either of those things, is there? Now, the results I get range from the downright insulting ("NO, I won't play any Good fucking Charlotte, ok? But feel free to try again!") to....the extremely cool ("Sure, I think I might have a Kyuss song for you!").

But more often than not, no matter how old the requester is, and they're often very young (i.e., early- to mid-twenties), they want to hear what is what most consider to be "old school" Rock N' Roll. It boggles my mind how....whether it be a girl who's 21-years-old if she's a day, requesting A-HA's "Take On Me" (ok, that might not be very "Rock N' Roll" but you get my point) or an entire room full of them singing on the top of their lungs with their hands in the air to Bon Jovi's "Livin' On a Prayer"....or whatever. Granted, these were HUGE commercial hits in their time, but most of these people weren't even born yet when these songs were initially popular.

But what really boggles my mind, is that I get WAY more requests for Guns N' Roses and Led Zeppelin, etc, than I ever do for fucking Nickleback or Fall Out Boy, et al. Doesn't that strike you as being a bit strange.

I mean, when I was younger, I was into what was happening at the time and what had become old school. In my experiences, which, again, are limited to New York City in this case, the old school seems to be the rule. I mean, sure, you go out and hear She Wants Revenge and Black Rebel Motorcycle Club and Kings of Leon, but.....those bands (like my own) are far more reminiscent of....again, old school Rock N' Roll....which, the more time passes, covers a lot more ground and a lot more subgrenres. I think it's awfully interesting.

Is music (or, more accurately, the "music business") killing itself, and rendering itself obsolete? Are people's tastes actually just as good as they always were, and like many of us, do people just look for what they want out of music from the figurative history books? Is it true that there just isn't a standard of quality with music anymore, which causes people to turn a deaf ear to what's going on currently?

Who the hell knows?

What's great about it is this: no matter what's going on in music today, there's always going to be that singer or band that you never heard...whose song is going to cross paths with your ears, and make you say, "Holy SHIT, what the hell IS that? Well, FIND OUT!!!" Ahahahahaha. I mean, case in point, last Summer, I was in a minivan being hauled to the movie set, when I heard something BRILLIANT emitting from the speakers.....and I heard this GREAT guitar lead and I said, "Hey...will you please turn this up?" Then, after about 10 more seconds, I said, "WOW!!!! This is AWESOME!!!! What IS THIS?" Well, it was UFO's "Doctor Doctor" on some satellite radio station. I've loved the band ever since! Like Mick Jones from the Clash once said, "If doesn't matter when you get it, as long as you get it."

My point is that there's always going to be great music out there.....just keep listening for it. And if you find something awesome, let me know!

Take care,

Marty E.

PS-And I hope that somebody somewhere out there gets one of those moments I just described when they hear the Dirty Pearls, ahahahahahaha.....

From just over a year ago: A few words about my definition being real, or I can't believe you would say such a thing!!!

I made this entry on my Myspace blog about a year ago....I thought it was one of my better entries, and just as relevant today as it was then, if not moreso...read on.....

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

I am out all the time....and when I'm out, I do a lot of talking. And, believe it or not, I do a hell of a lot of listening too. Conversation is life's most immediately accessible art-form, I think.

But, something comes up often-often enough to make me ponder and write about it.

I get comments, especially from women that I know, that they prefer me when I'm being "real".

But I don't know what they mean.

I think what they mean is that they like it better when I'm not talking about my band, my music, kicking ass, getting successful, getting fucked up, and generally doing the things that I do.

But seriously, those things are so incredibly real to me....and maybe they don't understand, that's the way I live. Rock N' Roll is my life, and everything I do is for that, ultimately. Sure, when I'm 3 beers into the evening, and I talk about growing up as a geek or how cool I think my nieces/nephews are, or how my brothers' wives had a big hand in making me who I am, it might be more appealing than how many clubs I've sold out in New York City or how great a time I'm going to have in LA next month. But, that doesn't make those things any more or less real.

It's all real....across the board. I don't feel that anything I say or do, ever, is insincere, dishonest, or disingenuous in any way, shape, or form....to a fault at times. Just because I'm not kissing someone's ass or disagree with someone doesn't mean I'm not being real. On the contrary, it means that I fucking AM being real....perhaps much more so than the person at the other end. Every time I sing a song, pound the drums, shake a good friend's hand, or kiss a beautiful girl, you can bet your sweet ass that it's 100% for real.

Case in point, there was an occasion recently in which I thought someone really overstepped some bounds with me, and was extremely presumptuous. I became a little bit upset, which happens pretty rarely. I usually take the high road (insert joke here, ahahahaha....) when it comes to trivial conflicts such as this, but there are certain things that I think a person shouldn't have to tolerate, no matter how easy going he/she might be....and I'm pretty fucking easy going! But this person, again, said something about liking me better when I'm "real", as opposed to having my guard up and calling shit the way I saw it. Fuck that - I WAS being real. It's just that this person REALly pissed me off. But that's over now.

I remember when I was in one of my old bands...I'm sure you know which one....someone came up to the bass player and I and said she liked the band but wishes we sang about "real" things. We replied that we played songs about Sex, Drugs, & Rock N' Roll....and since we do those things, there isn't anything unreal about it. I don't think she understood. But have you listened to the Rolling Stones Sticky Fingers album? Well, "Sister Morphine", "Brown Sugar", and Sway" are all on there...so are "I've Got The Blue" and "Wild Horses"....and it doesn't get any more real than the Stones (well...up until 1983, ahahahaha....). My point is that those songs aren't all about the same subjects...and they don't sound the same. But what ties them all together, besides the fact that they are absolutely brilliant, is that, to my ears, they are 100% the real fucking thing.

My point is, best exemplified by the following juxtaposition for you to chew on....I think that Poison songs like "Talk Dirty To Me" and "I Want Action" are probably far more real than any of the pseudo-Christian "rock" candy-ass muzak spewed forth by the likes of Nickleback and Creed, ok?

I'm hope this has cleared any doubt on the subject.

First review of The Perfect Age of Rock N' Roll posted....

....and it's quite favorable: http://ijulian.blogspot.com/2009/04/newport-beach-film-festivaljason-ritter.html

What an insane Saturday night....even what I missed was awesome....

I'm gonna start by saying thank you to everyone who made the second headlining Dirty Pearls show at the Bowery a SOLD OUT success. That means, thanks to each and every member of that beautiful crowd...I mean, wow....like Don Henley once sang, "I thought I knew what love was...what did I know?" Ahahahahaha.....

.....and THANKS to everyone who helped us promote the show, via interviewing us, by telling your friends about us, reposting our self- promo posts, or what-have-you. Every little bit helps, and means a whole hell of a lot to us.

I think above all, I have to thank our crew that night....of course there's Dave, our manager....and Jeff, Nate, Tommy, Joey, Mystie, Lauren, Jamie, and of course, the "Pearlettes", Jennifer and Alex.....the impact of that show wouldn't have been as massive had it not been for your help, nor would it have gone nearly as smoothly.....I hope I didn't miss anyone....hahahahaha....

It was really glorious up there for me, and for the rest of the band too.....I will admit, I was a little nervous beforehand, which is rare for me. As soon as I stepped on that stage, those nerves just melted away....I think it was the sound of the audience beginning to scream that cut through my nerves like a hot knife through frozen butter....THANKS again.

I think it might have been the best show I ever played, all in all.

We're just waiting for the results to come in from this show, and it might take a week or two....the last time, we got opening gigs with Twisted Sister, the New York Dolls, then Bret Michaels....so I'm excited to see what might happen this time. I'll keep you posted.

On another note, The Perfect Age of Rock N' Roll (the movie in which I am part of the principal cast) world premiered at the Newport Beach Film Festival, also this past Saturday night....I hear from my boy Jasin that it was standing room only, for a capacity crowd of 300 people, who evidently loved it....I hear that people were fighting over the last few admissions....these are all very good signs, and inspire confidence that there might be a nation and/or worldwide release coming soon. Anyway, thanks to everyone I worked with on the film...I love you all...and to anyone who might have caught the premiere....I hope I looked ok, ahahahahaha....

Above all, I just want to thank all of my friends & family for supporting me, thick and thin, drunk and sober.....insane and more insane....you mean the world to me....it's all going to happen, and I'm taking you all with me.....

Marty E.

A very in-depth interview w/ Crusher Magazine...

Thanks Christine, for the great questions and great times!

http://www.crushermagazine.com/features4_09/featpearls.htm

Review of The Dirty Pearls at the Bowery Ballroom

Thanks, Guys!

http://blogsnroses.com/2009/04/27/review-of-the-dirty-pearls-at-the-bowery-ballroom.aspx

The best way to not get jaded, bitter, and old is to learn how to get over it and move on....

I meet a lot of people in my travels. I cross many paths. A lot of water has passed underneath the bridge that my life is, and plenty of shit goes down. I know I'm not unique in that, especially in this town. Everyone I know is probably living some kind of perpetual mini series.

I'm more into comedy than drama....I don't mind WATCHING drama, but I'd rather live a comedy...which is not to say that I want life to be a joke or that I don't take it seriously....quite the contrary.

Nobody's perfect, but time and again, I see people who do nothing but complain, complain, complain.....and bellyache about this and that which happened in the past. They hold grudges, dwell on ancient history, and consequently hold bitterness in their hearts. And what good does THAT do? It ages a person, and makes them unattractive to others. People can see your true colors pretty quickly, I think....just ask them.

I learned very early in life that when life throws shit at you like some rhesus fucking monkey, or knocks you down like steamroller, the best thing to do is wipe yourself off, feel the pain for a *little* while, then face forward and do your best to learn a lesson, move the fuck on, and GET THE FUCK OVER IT. How did I learn this? Let's just say I lost a lot of significant family members before age 12, ok? But the rest of my family and I didn't waste our lives sitting around and moping and crying about it. We turned chicken shit into chicken salad and made the best of it! It's not being callous or cold (two things that I am definitely not), it's simply facing reality but not letting it kill who you are.

We all have our stories about why our lives are fucked up in one way or another....nobody wants to hear you complain. People want to be inspired and forget about the shitfalls of their own, even if for a few moments. To me, that's what Rock N' Roll is about in a lot of ways, and is one of the more poignant reasons why I do and believe in what I do.

And so far it's going pretty well, because I couldn't be bothered with any reasons why it WOULDN'T! I mean, the whole world is stacked against most everybody.....that's a given. Why dwell on the fucking negative? Forget about that shit....and I refuse to travel in negative company....can you dig it? Too many people justify their own failures and problems with all these reasons why they can't do something, how it's all someone fucking else's fault, and pretty much just bitch, bitch bitch their lives away. They take no responsibility for anything, even their own actions.

Not me!

That all being said, we all have problems and disagreements. That's just life. But coming to a resolution is awfully important. Some people are actually taken aback by how forgiving I can be.....and how quickly I'll apologize when it's proper for me to do so. I'm not saying I'm righteous or that I'm even close to always being right. What I am saying is that if there are problems, and there often are, the best thing to do is to atone in whatever way you can and move the fuck on. The longer you let shit fester, the more lines will appear on your face. People, at least the sharp ones, can smell bitterness from miles away, and most of them don't like it. You don't have to be friends with EVERYBODY....but not eveybody is ENEMIES with everyone you don't like, you know? And gratuitous shit-talking is only going to reflect badly on you. Again, I see it happening again and again.

You'd be amazed at how good it feels, if you have a chance, to let the shit that ails you go. It's like concrete blocks have been lifted off your shoulders and replaced by wings. Chances are that the shit that's keeping you down is doing so because you enable it to. That makes you your own worst enemy....and who has time for that shit? Life is, indeed, too fucking short - and remember, it's YOUR life! Take heed and take care.....and while everyone else is bellyaching, shit-talking, and pussyfooting around, you'll be laughing, kicking ass, and having fun. I know which sounds better to me! How about you?

Exclusive Interview with Marty E From the Dirty Pearls Part 2

http://blogsnroses.com/2009/04/09/exclusive-interview-with-marty-e-from-the-dirty-pearls-part-2.aspx

Repost from my Myspace blog from this past November: I just saw the movie I’m in...or, what the hell am I doing up there?

I was going through my Myspace blog to see what might be worth reposting here....so, this will be my first installment of reposts that are still relevant today....

Friday, November 14, 2008

So, after the debacle in Hollywood, I flew home....to be greeted by a low-key screening of the movie I "acted" in this past Summer....it's called The Perfect Age of Rock N' Roll, and stars Kevin Zegers, Jason Ritter, Taryn Manning, Peter Fonda, Lucas Haas, Jason Cadic....and ME!

Here's a little background info: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1242548/fullcredits

I'll tell you something: it's quite a trip to see yourself up on the big screen, when you've never been in that position before. It's almost as if you feel like you're someone else....which I suppose, if you're acting, you ARE. But I'm not used to it....

...that being said, it really is fucking cool, for me at least. I say this mostly because I think this movie is great....it's true to life, and very, very Rock N' Roll....hell, I'm playing a rambunctious drummer in it....how much more true to life can you get than that?

One thing I thought about though, last night, while I was slamming light beer and watching this thing, was where I was and what I was thinking when the individual scenes were filmed. It conjured up many ghosts what had happened to me that day (and a lot of whacked out shit happened over the Summer), whom I woke up next to (don't even ask, Smartass), new friends I'd made, what kinds of crazy hijinks some of us were up to on the set, the crazy parties we had in hotel parking lots, etc. It was a strange sort of visual emotional roller coaster, as if it was going on inside my mind, except it was up there on the screen!!! I can tell you that I spent most of the film laughing my ass off.....because, not only is a lot of it funny, but I really had fun being a part of it.....I really had no responsibilities to speak of, save for showing the fuck up, and being myself...which basically gave me a license to Rock out, and have fun!

Yeah, that's tough shit, isn't it?

Today, we put some finishing touches on it....I did my voiceovers and all that shit, because there were some sound issues....but it looks like it'll be completely finished before Christmas. It has been submitted in some form to the Sundance Film Festival, and....if it gets in, that's where it will debut....and I'll do my damnedest to be there for it!

Anyway, being part of this film and the entire process was very special to me, just like making music with my band....let's just call it a very close second, or the next best thing. But, as with anything you do that's creative and expressive, the best part is often taking a look at what you've done when it starts coming to fruition....that's got to be the most rewarding thing I can think of really....especially when you're close to the other people who are involved....it's like getting hot and bothered with that sweet angel girl you didn't even know existed a week ago and now you're staring at her ceiling with a cigarette in your mouth wondering how the fuck you got there, ahahahahahaha. (wait a second...what did I say the next best thing was again? Ah, never mind)...it's a fucking beautiful thing...and a feeling that's too rare...and irreplaceable!

Anyway, I can't wait for you all to see this film...it's something I think everyone involved is really proud of, and I think everyone will dig it.

Take care,

Marty E.

Exclusive Interview with Marty E From the Dirty Pearls Part 1

http://blogsnroses.com/2009/04/08/exclusive-interview-with-marty-e-from-the-dirty-pearls-part-1.aspx

Thanks again, guys!

Marty E.